Prepped for A24C and Misc

Today I went grocery shopping to prepare for my first 10 days on the Advocare program.  I'm so ready to start.  Have you ever been so "off plan", that you actually are craving structure?  I think that's where I am. I'm just blah...ready to start, ready to feel energized, ready to see some poundage come off.  I'm hoping to lose 15-20 pounds during the 24 day plan, and if it's more then that's awesome, if it's not, then I'll just keep trying.  I am 84 days away from my trip to Disneyland, and quite frankly, I'd like to weigh 84 pounds less than I do now.  I've been told it's going to be a tight squeeze for me, and will probably need a seat belt extender.  I'm terrified of this prospect.  I haven't flown since I've been so big that I needed one.  

Isn't it amazing how fixated I am on this issue about me flying?  I just do not want there to be any reason why they would want to make me pay for an extra seat.  I can deal (though quite frankly I will be dying inside) with the seat belt thing, and we are all hopefully going to be in one row with the little between us, so that should help me not feel so squashed.  Good Lord.  I really have to get on this.  84 days.  84 days.  To lose as much weight as I can.  It's so bad that I don't want to go just because of the airplane ride...

Also, I'm having some anxiety about all the walking.  I've already been "warned" that its go-go-go from sun up to midnight each day, but quite frankly, I won't be able to do that, or else I won't have a good time.  I'm hoping that it works out that I can hang out with my MIL at the hotel, or at a cafe while the others go ride the rides I don't want to ride.  I will get out there and do, but quite frankly, the issues I've had with my feet after walking just a 5k.  I'm hoping for the best, and I'm thinking that lots of Red Bull and Iced Latte's should get the job done.  I'm pretty glad we'll have a few days at home (albeit busy with racing) before we go back to work after this trip.  Something tells me I'm going to need the recovery time. 

I know that I can't let myself be defeated before it starts, however, 84 days to lose even 40 pounds is going to be a challenge, and I'm scared.  I'm scared I'll fail, scared I'll end up being laughed at, humiliate my family because I'm too fat to fly, and because I won't be able to keep up.  I'm also scared about going on the rides at Disneyland, however, I've been told there will only be a few rides that I can't ride due to my size...and most likely they'll be rides I don't want to ride anyway.  I like the "Small World" and "Autopia" type rides the most anyway.  

Advocare pre-note.

I've ordered my Advocare program, and should have it Tuesday or Wednesday.  My plan is to go grocery shopping this weekend, so I have everything I need for the first week and a half of the program.  I'm  going to pre-cook chicken breasts for lunches, plan my dinners, etc.  I'm not going to post my full menu yet, however, my plan is to blog every single day through the plan, during while I will list how I feel, the menu for the day, any exercise, etc.

Anyway, I hope you will stick with me during the Advocare journey and beyond!

I'm going to it....

I have definitely decided that I'll be doing the Advocare 24 Day Challenge.  I've heard nothing but good reviews, and I figure someone like myself that has lots of weight to lose, and benefits from the stricter regiment can really benefit from it.  I should be starting the program sometime around the end of next week.  I'll be ordering it on Friday, and was considering doing the protein smoothie cleanse until I get it so I can maybe clear the way for the healthier stuff. 

I plan on blogging about each and every day of my journey through the program.  If it works well, then I'll be doing it again right after.  If I follow to a T, there isn't any reason I shouldn't lose the weight.  

There's no reason I shouldn't lose the weight if I follow ANY program to a T...

Lack of discipline, lack of energy, lack of true belief I will ever undo all the damage I have done to myself...

How did I allow myself to get this way?????

Trying something new...I think.

So I have been toying with the idea of doing the Advocare 24 Day Challenge.  I think this would be really beneficial to me in the fact that if I follow it to the letter, I know I would lose a bunch of weight, however, I'm terrified of taking weight loss supplements (and most other medications, even anything stronger than Tylenol or Ibuprofen).  This is something I know is probably mostly in my mind, though I think I am really sensitive to my body, and can feel everything that happens when I take something.  I know I sound like a spaz. 

Anyway, I just don't know anymore.  I have decided I am going to force myself to start getting up 30 minutes earlier so I can do squats and ride the exercise bike or follow this Walk at Home program that my friend and I are going to do together.  I'm thinking that if I can get on board with this Advocare deal, and doing all this physical activity, then there isn't any reason I shouldn't lose like 20 pounds in the 24 day period.  Seriously.  People half my weight lose like 10-15 pounds doing it, so being HUGE means HUGE weight loss.  Ugh.  I am so gross!  I seriously can't stand that I have gotten this big.  It's disgusting!

So that's where I'm at right now...oh yeah, I decided I was going to try following the Weight Watchers program...I have the whole kit.  Yesterday I tracked everything, which, let me tell you was not fun.  I had 2 cupcakes a coworker brought in, and in a not-so-great decision, I ate a whole pack of Starburst that I pilfered from my kid's "treat" bucket.  I don't even like Starburst...okay, I like the pink ones, but I ate all the rest of the pack so nobody felt left out.

Today I had Jimmie Johns.  #12 Beach Club and a bag of Jalapeno Chips.  Not the best at all.  There is SO much sodium in that!  Ridiculous!  I love the taste so much!  But I feel my blood pressure rise from the salt.

I have a Dr. appointment in a few weeks... I haven't been since about oh, 25 pounds ago.  Not as much as I would like after 14 months, but it's 25 pounds I haven't gained back.  Also, hopefully with getting up early to work out every day during the week, and trying hard to manage my food, I can be even lower by then.  I'll be getting a full bloodwork panel, fasting, and a general physical.  They think I'm getting an annual, they are loco!  NOPE! 

Anyway, if I decide against Advocare, here's my new plan:

1.  wake up and work out 30 minutes + squat challenge
2.  breakfast protein smoothie
3.  snack protein shake
4.  mason jar salad and fruit
5.  greek yogurt with bran and frozen fruit
6.  dinner of veggies and protein
7.  snack protein shake
8.  half my body weight in water every day

Anyone should lose weight if they stick to this plan!  Weekends are the hardest, because the boys don't follow my plan, and we are always busy.  And what about when I have to go out of town for the weekend next month?  I really, really have to work hard to make really good decisions! 

I'm still trying...

So about six weeks ago I found out our trip to Disneyland was booked.  Flight booked.  Flight.  Airplane.  OMG, too fat to fly.  You might remember my last post was something of a panic attack.  Don't get me wrong...I'm still panicking.  Yet, I'm still trying.  I allowed myself a mental temper tantrum and essentially let myself eat whatever and whenever I want.  I'm done with that.  The other night I was laying in bed, praying that the Lord would help me do this.  I even started to cry.  It's THAT bad.  I'm so big, who am I kidding?  I have found myself reading horror stories on the internet about fat people flying, and being ridiculed by airline staff, and asked to pay up to $1000 for an additional seat so they don't encroach on other passengers' personal space.  Thankfully we are all three flying together, and little man is a skinny mini so I can put him in the middle and at least make it look like are all super comfy and fit well.  Thank God it's only a 2 hour flight, because I'm sure it'll be super uncomfortable. 

A friend recently flew, and she is about 40 pounds less than I am, and said it was still pretty darn cramped.  While I felt a lot better after discussing it with her, it still left me with a lot of anxiety.  I am going to try really hard to lose as much weight as possible, and get as fit as possible to prepare for all the walking.  I just bought a new bathing suit top, which fits rather a bit snug right now, to help motivate me to lose more.   It will fit perfectly by summer. 

I've been drinking protein smoothies for breakfast with the following:

-1 scoop of Vegan Proteins+ Protein Powder
-1 cup frozen blueberries
-1 cup unsweetended Silk Coconut Milk
-1 Tbsp Chia Seeds soaked in 1 cup water
-1 Tbsp Coconut Oil
-1 scoop Greens Plus Advanced Multi Raw Superfood

This week I decided to step it up to having this protein smoothie for lunch as well as breakfast with a Premier Protein shake as a midday snack.  Then having a dinner consisting of major veggies and protein.  Today is day 2.  So far so good.  I did have some ice cream with apples for dessert last night, but I counted everything in MyFitnessPal...yes, we are back together.  I need to see something with my intake to keep me honest.  I've also decided to track all fitness as well.  Yesterday I even took a brisk walk during my lunch break...it was so sunny and I just needed the air and the vitamin D. 

Today as I asked hubby if we can take a family walk today before dinner and start doing that every day.  I really want to do this.  I want to get fit, and guess what I just did???  I JUST SIGNED UP FOR A 5K!  My super awesome friend Leslie is going to do it with me, and it's from one Winery to to another Winery.  That will be fun.  It's going to be hilly, which I'm kind of scared about, but it should be super fun.