Let's be real. I have totally and completely fallen off the wagon. I haven't been following a plan at all for about three months. I've posted about things I'm going to do, and haven't gotten back on the wagon per say, at all. Today is the last day of the unhealthy anarchy I've put on myself. It's ridiculous. I've gained about 8 pounds back and that is totally pissing me off.
I feel so ashamed that I was doing so well, and just completely fell off the wagon. I feel like a total hypocrite, that I'm blogging and telling my readers how they can be healthy, and giving suggestions, yet I'm whooping it up at Taco Hell and McDevil's. I was off the fast food almost completely, and then around the time I gave up the 5k events, I gave up entirely. It was a slow process back to the fast food though. At first I'd still try to eat the small meals every three hours or so, and tried to make sure I was eating protein, etc. But then more and more I started getting all willy-nilly and eating more and more crappy food.
There hasn't been any 30 minute sessions on the exercise bike; I haven't saved any money towards a gym membership for the winter; I haven't done anything. I feel like such a lame-o. I really feel motivated to get back on track, and so I took some steps today to get there. I put on my FitBit for the first time in months. Tomorrow is Day 1. I'll be doing an updated weigh in so the MyFitnessPal widget here is up-to-date. Tomorrow I'm going back to tracking everything through the MyFitnessPal app on my iPhone too. I know that I was most successful at the beginning of my journey, so one thing I'm going to also do is print all the food I tracked for the first few weeks of the "journey" and try changing back to that diet. It's one of the awesome features of MyFitnessPal.
Here are some of the hard facts:
1. In the last 7 days, I've eaten McDevil's about 5 times
2. I have eaten a total of about 3 pounds of Jordan Almonds at work in the last 2 weeks
3. For my birthday week, I ate about half of a 12" triple chocolate cake
4. Some of the clothes that were finally starting to feel loose, are not feeling loose anymore
5. I have started to feel that lazy, bloated, and worthless feeling again
Anyone in their right mind knows none of these issues are good, and all of them combined are a recipe for disaster. Certainly a handful of Jordan Almonds once in a while is okay, however a bag in a day is not really a good idea. Even worse, eating McDevil's 5 times in 7 days (one of the days it was twice) is so bad! I feel so guilty for doing it! I'm going to go back to doing what I was doing. I need to get on my bike again, and start walking the dogs like I said I was going to do every day, and I need to track every single crumb that goes into my mouth. I can't be successful unless I follow this. Another bad habit of mine is "trying to change it up". I am never successful when I do this, because I end up losing track of what I'm doing, and then next thing I know it's all over.
I'm sorry, readers, if I have let you down in any way by not keeping up with this. I've tried to keep the blog interesting with some projects, and some Pinterest projects, but I need to get back to the roots of why I started this blog: my journey. Me. Living life to the fullest, and doing everything I can to be healthy for my family, and myself. I can't be happy unless I'm healthy. They are so directly correlated for me, and to turn a blind eye to that fact is a tragedy.
I appreciate each and every one of you that have supported me thus far, and I hope you will bear with me while I get my butt back in gear, and get back to the program.
Thank you all!
